You know that part of Mass, at the very beginning when we ask God to forgive our sins – those we have done and those we have failed to do? I got to thinking about the Feast of the Epiphany and how it is a time to give gifts and I got to thinking about what I give freely, and what and when I don’t.
When I was growing up I recall how anytime I went out to lunch with my grandmother she would always buy. I don’t know why, other than she had money and I didn’t. As a grandmother now, I wish I had paid a few of those times. Anyway, we were at lunch one time, and my aunt was with us. Grandma said “What’s it called when everyone pays for their own lunch?” She was looking for the phrase “Dutch Treat” but my aunt didn’t miss a beat when she said “stingy”. So from that point on whenever we went out to lunch we always referred to paying for our own meal as “going stingy”.
That got me to thinking about Epiphany and for the times in my life that I have been stingy. Maybe I didn’t give all that I could. Maybe I didn’t give at all. I’m not talking money here. I think there is a place for money but in my gifts I’d much rather give non-tangible things.
Like my talents. I have been blessed with many gifts, many interests, many talents. I can type really fast. Most of the time I can type faster than I can talk. That’s saying something. I have a good strong voice. I can talk loud. I can sing loud. I’ll never be on American Idol but I can carry a tune. Thank God for karaoke. I know all the words to most of my favorite songs. That’s why growing up I got to sing lead. I knew the words. Another talent that I have is that I can write. That’s one of those talents I didn’t let anyone know that I had for almost 40 years. I didn’t even let myself know it. Something else, I can raise kids. I’m not saying I’m a good mother because I don’t think I’m real maternal. But I have raised 4 kids who seem to have turned out really good, despite me. I have other talents too like I’m a good photographer and I can build websites and I can sell ice to an eskimo but those are more what I do, not who I am.
I’m not always free with my talents. I don’t always offer them up. A lot of that is a lack of confidence but sometimes it’s just plain laziness.
Secondly, I don’t always share my faith. I am a faith-filled person. I am strong in my faith. But my daddy always told me not to discuss politics or religion with anyone. He told me that was the easiest way to lose a friend. In some ways, I agree. I don’t care what your politics are. But I do think in today’s world that we must take a stand if only in our homes. We need to vote. I don’t care what your religion is. But if you do not acknowledge your faith I think you are really missing the boat. I don’t want you to try to convert me and I promise that I will not try to convert you. But, you have got to have faith – in something. If you don’t I hope you let me have that conversation with you. Where I’m stingy though is the fact that I know someone has lost their faith and I don’t go help them find it. You know faith is very personal and I don’t want to intrude (these are the things I tell myself). But when it’s time to go to heaven do you think God will be harder on the one who lost their faith or the one who won’t help them find it?
The last thing I’m guilty of being stingy with is my praise. You know me. You know I brag on my children over and over. But I don’t brag on others that need it, that deserve it. I don’t brag on the Kims in my life. My sister, Kim, is the best friend anyone has ever had. She’s a little bossy but sometimes we need that. She tells us that we need it. As friends go, you can’t go wrong with my sister. But as friends go, you really can’t go wrong with my friend, Kim. She means so much to me. She is my spiritual compass. She lets me go to town but then she’ll reel me back. I don’t know where I’d be without her on my faith journey. And, the Blessed Mother brought her to me. My friend, Shane, keeps my creative juices flowing. I don’t want to call him my muse but every time I see him I have this urge to be creative. If you were to meet him you would consider him overly quiet. But once you get to know him, he can be your daily motivation. I wish everyone had a Shane in their life. You can’t have mine. The last one that I would like to praise is really a group: the women of Sacred Heart Academy. These women are so talented and powerful and loving and powerful. These are the women I pray that I raised my daughters as. The mascot for Sacred Heart is the valkyrie. That fits us so well. These women are Valkyries. I wouldn’t want to be their enemy. They would be able to hurt you, and then love you back (because they were raised by Ursuline sisters).
Yeah, you don’t want to mess with some of these women.
Even though I didn’t plan this, I’m starting another New Year’s resolution. I’m not going to go stingy with these gifts. If it’s too much though, please let me know. I have a tendency to be over-zealous.
Do me a favor, buy your grandmother’s lunch every once in awhile.